i'm not joking about this

every now and then andy threatens to break up with me when i watch horrible tv shows or listen to shitty music. it's understandable, i guess, because most of the shows i watch are pretty dumb. once he said he was gonna break up with me if i kept watching paris hilton's my new bff among other shows, and i think he got pretty mad when i paid for a britney spears song on itunes (circus). he usually just says it to make a point about how he hates stupid chick shows and pop music. it's funny that he never jokes about breaking up with me over legitimate stuff, like me eating all the dibs and thin mints, because if someone came into my house and ate all my stuff i'd be pretty pissed off. i'd probably cry about it if i didn't live next door to the grocery store...

anyway, i guess andy's mellowed out lately because i just downloaded ke$ha's album - as in, PAID FOR - and he didn't seem to have a problem. yeah, he thinks i'm dumb, but i know that deep down inside he likes the songs. which brings me to my point - the album is pretty good. i almost don't believe that i'm saying that. there are some bad, bad songs on there with ridiculous lyrics, and i'm not even sure you can call a lot of it "singing," but even the bad songs are catchy as hell. one of my faves is "party at a rich dude's house." it's so dumb, but so awesome. if you like fun, mindless, party pop music and have 10 bucks to blow, download this album immediately. i've already gotten $10 of enjoyment out of it. don't hate me.

cult of mary kay

if you're a chick you've probably been approached at one time or another by a mary kay rep hoping to recruit you for the leadership program. the reps most often strike up conversations while shopping. usually the script goes "excuuuuse me, but you just look *soooo* professional and put-together! might i ask what you do for a living?" my coworker amy had a run-in with one of these ladies at costco yesterday, but this one was not so calm and collected. told me the lady was completely incoherent, rambling on about baby boomers, and totally psycho. amy told the lady she wasn't really interested, but gave out her office phone number to get her to go away. this morning she called and amy sent the call to her own voicemail which was a genius move since all the voicemails are forwarded to our email as audio files.

what you're about to hear is almost unbelievable:

file may take a few seconds to download

*voice has been digitally altered*

four-minute voicemail. you probably noticed that she gave out her cell number 3 times. as andy would say, "that woman is bat-shit crazy!"

disclaimer: i realize mary kay is a legitimate business. i know a few girls who have gotten into this and who are very successful. i'm not saying that all reps who recruit total strangers in retail stores are psycho, but face it, this lady is not helping the image.

here's what's up:

1. thanks to laura (& james), i'm now another step closer to getting a black belt in tae kwon do, however, i think our club has completely dissovled. i'm very sad. can't really afford to continue at another studio, and the odds of having an instructor like the guy in "the foot fist way" seem much too high.

2. my brother has a girlfriend. andy's already facebook-stalked her but didn't come up with much. (marissa: if you're reading this, welcome to the blog. you're gonna want to go ahead & bookmark this page. but don't check it more than once a week. i've gotten lazy and don't post very often.)

3. still addicted to snood. actually, i'm more addicted to knocking andy off the high score list on the evil setting. he's got the #3 spot on his computer, but i've got all of the nine remaining high scores. recently our friday nights have consisted of a cheap dinner out, a few beers at home, some catching up on tv, then we play video games until 3am. life's good.

4. anyone wanna buy a 1-bedroom condo in "the river west" complex? andy's selling. it's off northside parkway near mount paran. ground floor with huge patio overlooking bunch of trees. nice pool & gym.

5. celebrating chad's 28th birthday this weekend. we're all going to dress up like harry potter characters and watch all the movies back to back, and every time a character says "brilliant" or "rubbish" we're going to take a shot!!! ... actually, this is not what we're doing at all. chad, sorry if i got you excited.

6. lots of interesting goings-on at work today. here are the highlights:

transport the dummy, "sandy." all i gotta say is it's a good thing he's wearing pants.

like a glove

whose idea was it to move this thing

just making sure this thing works properly after the software upgrade

hours of entertainment

last weekend andy & i went to our neighborhood ace hardware looking for some specific items [that we didn't find] and ended up at the display of droll yankees squirrel-proof bird feeders. ace had a booth set up with the products complete with promo video. it was an enjoyable 10 minutes of epic squirrel-fails. i don't need a bird feeder, but by the end of the video i was ready to purchase, certain that i was in store for hours of entertainment. but...the good one - the "flipper," was $150. no thanks. the company claims that they have the most entertaining and effective feeders. see for yourself:



this video is kinda long and boring in parts. i know you just wanna get to the squirrel-flipping. there are also some funny videos on youtube from individuals that are definitely worth 30 seconds of your time.

respectable, legitimate businesses

recently i was responsible for clearing out my firm's small storage facility and transferring the stuff to a larger place. it's not another storage unit, but basically an empty shop space/warehouse with an attached office in a 10-unit building. corner of south cobb drive and concord road in smyrna. location doesn't really bother me, but you won't catch me around this place after dark, that's for sure. our space is surrounded by body shops, auto custom/detail shops and similar.

warshauer law group product liability research lab ready for action

over the course of three days i moved a few truckloads of stuff in, vacuumed the dingy, threadbare carpet, and attempted to clean the bathroom, at least to the point where i wouldn't mind using it. previous tenant left a few personal items behind: toothbrush, shaving cream, scissors, white powdery substance tiny plastic bag...yikes. i took a photo to show my coworkers but sorry, not posting it here. luckily i didn't find any additional paraphernalia.

anyway, i introduced myself to the guys working outside of the neighboring shops. might as well make some friends. i'm sure they got a kick out of me.

on one side we have willie's auto care shop and on the other is "trafik jamz" custom auto shop, can't remember the guy's name, but he was working on a truck that was so jacked up he had to stand on a ladder to get in it. this is *so* not my world, which makes it totally amusing and hilarious.

photo of insane truck shielded by my tinted shop window

stealth photo of truck from a distance

stuff from ten years ago

lately i've been wasting a lot of time playing a computer game: snood. and no i'm not just now discovering this game. i remember i got my freshman roomie hooked on it, oh, about ten years ago, and we were unstoppable. my mom got me re-hooked on it recently, and i'm cursing her right now because it's after midnight and i can't seem to stop playing... and i'm sure andy is cursing me right now because i installed it on his machine too and set all the high scores. somehow he managed to get a score on the list, but i spent another hour playing, knocking his score off. i bet he's up right now trying to beat me.

while i'm thinking about it, here are some other things that i recall being awesome/popular/cool/new from ten+ years ago. i'm sticking to fashion and technology mainly because, uh, i've been wearing clothes for quite some time, and i'm interested in tech stuff. some of these things are indeed awesome, some of them are absolutely ridiculous. read on:

timberland boots

you know the ones. i scored a pair of these because my grandmother bought them for me. not really a bad trend, since they were comfortable and durable. much, much more sensible than jelly shoes.

anoraks from the gap

mmm...packable nylon pullovers. i think this fad was completely worn out by 2000, but when i think about high school i can't help but be reminded of them. anyway, i remember *everyone* wore these things, didn't matter if it was raining or windy. and even though an anorak is a functional piece of outerwear, i recall people wearing these things as regular clothes. like, it was part of the outfit. went with the timberland boots, i guess. i had one that was hunter green. i think i got my mom to buy me one because whitney allgood had one. functional, yes. fashionable...apparently so.

gap overalls

what the hell was this trend about? sadly, it lasted for a few years. i remember all the cheerleaders had these and would often wear them on friday for some sort of school spirit deal. they had to be from the gap though, any other brand was a definite no-no. my mom bought me a pair and even though i felt idiotic, i still wore them. they did come in handy when i got a severe sunburn right at my waistline and couldn't wear regular pants/shorts (pictured above - check out my unusually intense summer glow).

chaco sandals

these weren't quite so mainstream as a lot of this other stuff, but i remember some people going ape-shit over them. maybe they're still popular, i dunno. i will give credit to lauren marcum though, she was the first person i knew who had a pair.

napster

when i think about napster & downloading music the first people that come to mind are justin mills & ryan mcquaig. i had a class with these clowns, and i guess i heard about it first from them. sharing/downloading music and mp3s in general was a whole new thing, at least to me, and the legality of it all wasn't really questioned.

burning/ripping cds - right along there with napster was the art of burning your very own mix cd. totally awesome technology. not everyone had a pc so kids would give ryan mcquaig lists of songs to burn to disc, or he'd copy discs for them. funny how i go ten years without thinking about ryan mcquaig, and then he somehow makes his way onto my blog. twice. huh. when i finally got a computer with a writeable drive i burned myself a copy of "the marshall mathers lp" and i thought i was bad ass.

cell phones that fit in your pocket,

only not really

I had the one on the left for a while, which was pretty small compared to my mom's bag phone but still pretty sizeable. i've still got this thing in a drawer at my mom's house. so awesome. later my dad upgraded me to the small one on the right, which was way cooler because you could almost fit it in the pocket of your gap overalls.

99x big day out - i was uncool for a number of reasons in high school, but i always felt pretty lame because i had never seen a live rock concert. adam ware seemed to have an endless supply of these shirts. when i got to college i think i overcompensated for my lack of attending live shows by attending just one "string cheese incident" show at the tabernacle.

the new kroger - this was the best thing to hit dalton since the steak and shake. well, maybe not, but it was an improvement for sure. i remember blake gober, my brother, & i tailgated in the parking lot the morning that it opened. we bought breakfast and ate it in the bed of his truck. i saved the receipt. again, what the hell?

can't sleep, clown'll eat me.

this might be mildly amusing to those of you who studied computer science at tech - i think i saw mike mccracken in the fedex office store (near intersection of west paces ferry and northside parkway). actually, that's really not that amusing, is it? but i think it's funny because i *still* don't think of tech professors as real people with real lives who have errands to run and all that. if mccracken is still rockin' the bushy mustache, then it was definitely him. i almost said something to him but then realized if it really *was* him, i'd have nothing else to add to the conversation except "hey, thanks for not failing me. cs blows."

is anyone else as disturbed by the meth spots on radio & tv? the first time i saw them on tv i had really vivid nightmares for two nights in a row. the worst is the one with the girl in the shower. yuck.

ok and speaking of nightmares - andy & i were in illnois visiting his family and we saw this creep-o clown thing in a place called pizza villa:

don't watch this if you're scared of clowns.

totally looks like

amy & i were trying to clean some moldy furniture at the office on friday. there was a dish of soapy water that i left sitting for a few minutes. i came back into the room and was all freaked out because it looked like this:

and saturday andy & i had to help a lady move some boxes & furniture out of my office. and since no one else was around i let him ride the segway:

nothin to see here, people. just getting a soda on my segway

recent cheap finds

i'm always on the lookout for free stuff to do in atlanta or really cool places that have insane deals on good stuff (usually food). here are some recent discoveries:

garrisons in vinings jubilee has a $5 hamburger for lunch. price includes a side dish. i didn't order the burger, but my friend got one and it looked good. huge. and apparently this place also has 2-dollar yuenglings every night. this is quickly becoming one of my favorite restaurants, but dinner is a bit out of my price range. the place has a houston's-like atmosphere.

georgia state school of music gives free concerts. andy and i went to one at the rialto on valentines day. it was really good. and free. i know georgia tech usually charges for their shows, and they aren't as good. but beware, free concerts have all the annoyances of a free concert, ie. people who know nothing of concert etiquette. only other drawback is that parking rates downtown are usually higher on the weekend.

ever notice the coupons on the back of your receipt from kroger? right now they print good ones for subway and doc green's. i used to go to doc greens every now and then for the buffalo chicken salad, but if you get a drink you end up spending close to $10, which is not a good value in my book. the coupon is buy one entree and two drinks, and get 2nd entree [of equal or lesser value] free. andy and i went there last night and i spent under 12 bucks. and the one for subway is two regular footlong subs for 8.99. this beats the pants off the 5-dollar footlong deal because the turkey breast doesn't qualify for that deal but it qualifies for my coupon.

just some random thoughts

• what is the deal with q-tips? the box says "a variety of uses." and there are graphics on the back illustrating a few examples, none of which include cleaning the ear canal. this is funny because most people i know, myself included, only buy q-tips for the purpose of cleaning ear canals.

• perhaps you've seen the signs near downtown atlanta pointing to different neighborhoods and districts. for example, a sign might have arrows to sweet auburn, cabbagetown, etc. i'm familiar with most of the names, but the one that always gets me is "SoNo district." perhaps you've seen that particular sign at the I-75/85 offramp to north ave. and thought "what the hell is soNo?" i've lived in atlanta for almost 10 years and i've never *ever* heard anyone throw out "soNo." fo sho.

• there was a really awesome radio station that andy & i listened to while we were in durango, colorado. "four corners rock" out of farmington, new mexico. beats the pants off project 9-6-1. they didn't play any shinedown, nickelback, or janes addiction, and we heard chevelle, some lesser known papa roach, and some other good stuff. i was hoping that they would stream music online so i checked for a website. here it is - http://www.krwn.com. so...i guess that's a "no," right?

• an arrangement of shops in a strip mall from right to left: my friends place (sandwiches), subway, soup garden (soup & salad bar), honey baked ham store, jenny craig, lane bryant. humorous.

winter x games

the winter x games 14 went down last week and if you didn't catch any of the snowboarding events then you missed out on some awesome stuff. sorry i can't embed the videos, i tried it earlier and it wouldn't work properly.

halldor helgason big air:
http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=4873682


and if you didn't see shaun white's insane run (and major bust), then here it is:
http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=4871381

even mary ellen was pumped over the games. i was watching a bit of womens superpipe then decided to take a shower since i was exhausted & grody from a day on the slopes (more on this vacation later). unfortunately i missed the finals, good thing mary ellen texted me to tell me that my "bff" gretchen won. andy & my mom like to joke about her being my bff. thing is, i've actually met her a few times - and by "met" i mean "scanned her lift ticket and said hi." i did chat with her for a minute when she was here in atlanta three yrs ago for peter glenn's winter expo. she signed my poster "anne, hope to see you sometime on buttermilk!" i was giddy for days. i secretly want to be her bff and/or follow-cam.

while i'm on the subject, check out this photo from 2007 when i was working at buttermilk in aspen.

some flying tomato action

i've been eBaying for 10 years. wow. and i still love it.

i've got my iBook up for auction on eBay right now. and it's at $202.50 with 17 hours to go, which is great. i've received a few questions over email, mainly asking for clarification about something i mentioned in the description. one guy asked a question and followed it up with, "I think you have the best ebay listing I have ever seen."

score. and you know, it's not even that good, but it's easy to read and gives you the important details. i shall let you view it here for your own education of course.

regarding the title of this post - i have been a member since january 11, 2000. and i've got 228 positive feedbacks - 100% - to show for it. it's been a good 10 years of buying and selling stuff. i've bought ski lift tickets, hard-to-find/discontinued beauty products, car parts, musical instruments, running shoes...the list goes on. one of the best deals i ever got was on my hockey skates, ~$35. i can't say i've ever been ripped off, but one time i did pay way too much for a snowboard with a flying pig graphic on it. so ebay, thanks for the memories. and i'll always continue to try on expensive sports gear in retail stores only to go home and immediately purchase it on ebay for way less.

you might enjoy these ads

good radio spot:

http://www.franksredhot.com/popups/radio_ad.html

and a favorite commercial on tv:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8QW0tT_xqQ
(also check out some of the related videos from the same channel)

fashion icon

a new season of project runway started last thursday and nicole richie was the guest judge. strange choice if you ask me, but apparently she's a fashion designer now. (i'd like to add andy's take on it: apparently any coke whore off the street can start her own clothing line.)

so you may have seen her on the show, but i'm guessing you missed the webisode where she explained the inspiration for her line:

click here for video

that's right, i'm on my way up.

lots of information

dudes. sorry it's been so long since i last posted. really...uh, i've been busy. i hope everyone's Christmas was excellent and i hope everyone had as much fun ringing in 2010 as i did. here are some photo highlights from the past three weeks:

got suckered into singing with mary ellen's
choir group. it was a lovely service of lessons & carols.

santa brought me a rack to display my
belts. kinda makes me want to train
for a black belt so i can fill that empty slot.

that's mary ann, andy's sis-in-law. andy's dad
gave us belvedere gift sets. the boys got scotch.

granne received a snuggie, just like every other person in america.

john sampled the brussel sprouts. i rather enjoyed them.

cathy, me, naomi (sari i am sorry you didn't make the pic!!)

i got a new digital camera for Christmas. it's waterproof.
i showed it to my friends, and the next thing i know my
camera's in the sink.

christmas gift?

it's not a party without rock band -
andy on the drums, jim on mike, chad on guitar.

here's what i am doing these days:

making my way through the stephanie plum series by janet evanovich. i guess you could classify them as suspense/mystery. and they make me laugh out loud. my friend liz jurick was always pushing me to read them, so i picked up "one for the money" a few years ago, then continued with "two for the dough." both were pretty good but i couldn't find books 3, 4, etc. in any of the thrift stores i frequented so i kinda gave up with the series and went back to harry potter [again]. and then the whole twilight thing happened... anyway, i decided i could finally afford used copies from amazon so i filled in my collection. right now i'm putting these things away at a rate of about one per week. currently on "to the nines." and even though they were written by a female with a female main character i'd say that guys would like them too since there's murder and drugs and weapons and explosions.

new iMac. ok, this is great- i can listen to music, backup my stuff with time machine, edit images, & blog all at the same time. vast improvement from my ibook g4. now i am trying to organize all my photos & mp3s and it's slow-going. didn't get a digital camera until 2003 so all the photos that i scanned don't have the correct date/time stamp. and i'm a freak so everything has to be in the right order of course. i'm looking to buy a video capture device for my new iMac so get ready for some freaking awesome highlights from the crap i watch on tv.

throwback website

the other day i was browsing the web for a vacation rental home and i found the worst website i've seen since 1995:

http://www.ski-utah-rentals.com/

the only thing missing is

<bgsound src="annoyingmusic.wav" loop="true">

or something similar.

i bet the camera guys were all peeing in their pants from laughter

here's the clip from biggest loser that i mentioned in my previous post. you know, the one with obese people jumping through hoops. sorry to keep you waiting. i've edited it a bit, ya know, cut out the dull parts. enjoy.




perhaps you think i'm a horrible, horrible person for posting this. but shame on you too, because i know you were laughing. to be fair, you should see me attempting to play with/care for a baby. it's almost as funny. but yeah, next time i suck really bad at something i'll try to remember to film it.

this stuff only happens on tv

andy & i went on a 7 day cruise from long beach, california to some places in mexico. the first afternoon out in the middle of the ocean there was an announcement that the captain was going to turn the boat around (head back toward san diego) and rendezvous with a coast guard helicopter because there has been an medical emergency. it was a 3-hour ordeal. those boats can't really turn on a dime, ya know. check out the action:

coast guard helicopter in sight. beer in hand. andy's thumb: way up.

of course the ship's staff chased everyone off the decks.
naturally, everyone went to hang out under this gigantic glass
roof for a good view. honestly, i was a little scared, but
no way was i going to miss this.

rescue at sea.

i have a much deeper respect for the coast guard, now that i've seen them in action. in all seriousness, it was an amazing rescue. both the helicopter pilot and the ship captain displayed some mad skillz. we never found out what the emergency was or what happened to the person who was air lifted.

note: i know it's been a while since i've blogged about the reality shows i'm watching. i'm not really watching that much good stuff lately- i've had to cut back for the sake of fitness. just the other day i saw an awesome moment on the biggest loser and must post it or link to it. involves obese people jumping through hoops. if you can't imagine how that is funny, then...i'm sorry, we can't be friends.

just some random thoughts

• what is the deal with q-tips? the box says "a variety of uses." and there are graphics on the back illustrating a few examples, none of which include cleaning the ear canal. this is funny because most people i know, myself included, only buy q-tips for the purpose of cleaning ear canals.

• perhaps you've seen the signs near downtown atlanta pointing to different neighborhoods and districts. for example, a sign might have arrows to sweet auburn, cabbagetown, etc. i'm familiar with most of the names, but the one that always gets me is "SoNo district." perhaps you've seen that particular sign at the I-75/85 offramp to north ave. and thought "what the hell is soNo?" i've lived in atlanta for almost 10 years and i've never *ever* heard anyone throw out "soNo." fo sho.

• there was a really awesome radio station that andy & i listened to while we were in durango, colorado. "four corners rock" out of farmington, new mexico. beats the pants off project 9-6-1. they didn't play any shinedown, nickelback, or janes addiction, and we heard chevelle, some lesser known papa roach, and some other good stuff. i was hoping that they would stream music online so i checked for a website. here it is - http://www.krwn.com. so...i guess that's a "no," right?

• an arrangement of shops in a strip mall from right to left: my friends place (sandwiches), subway, soup garden (soup & salad bar), honey baked ham store, jenny craig, lane bryant. humorous.

i love eBay [and young girls]

back from vacation. will post some stories later.

so i am browsing eBay for a cocktail dress. i know that sounds poor/stupid/risky, but you can get some insane deals on really nice clothes if you stick to brands/designers you're familiar with. the really cheap stuff comes from the dresses that were worn once and then cast aside. i'm looking for another dress by the same designer as my current favorite dress (BCBG max azria). i found a cute one for next-to-nothing, but had some concerns about the neckline & how it fit in the bust area since it's a different shape than the dress i own...don't wanna look like a complete ho at andy's office holiday party (just a partial ho). i emailed the seller a question, as any savvy eBayer would do, and figured since the seller was a lady she'd be willing to help a sister out. read and be amused:

Dear [username]

this looks like a great dress. i own another bcbg max azria dress, size 6 and it's my favorite dress, which is why i'm looking for another. the problem is that i'm afraid my top's gonna pop out, since this dress has a deep v. i wear bra size [TMI]. might i ask what size bra you wear and how the dress fits you, or if you have a photo of yourself in the dress that you can email me? i'd buy the dress right now, but am concerned about how the top fits....

[alright, i knew it was kinda personal to ask for a photo, but i've done this a few times and no one seems to have a problem with it, they just crop out their head or blur the face a little. and i only asked because it was apparent that the seller was female and was selling it as an individual, not a business.]

Dear skippy304,

Um, "Skippy", this was not my dress. I have 3 lovely, beautiful daughters between the ages of 19 and 23. None of them is going to model the dress for you. Sorry about that. I've given dimensions and other than that, frankly, I don't know what to tell you. If you do own BCBG, you're pretty familiar with how this line is cut. And I must say, in all honesty, that this is one of the creepiest requests I've ever had from anyone. I'm a 58 year old woman with my doctorate in educational administration, and frankly I hope I'm reading too much into your request.

- [username]


Dear [username],

Sorry if I offended you, I wasn't trying to be a creeper. Perhaps my user name threw you off. I am a 27 year old woman and was just hoping for a bit more insight since I can't try the dress on. For what it's worth, I've got a BS in computer science.


i was tempted to write "thanks for the info. in that case, i'm most interested in photos of your daughters when they were 8, 9 years old." (that line courtesy of my coworker, doug). anyway, seller responded that, yes, my user name did indeed throw her off. that was all she wrote. then i visited her "about me" page on eBay and here's the good stuff:

"Hello, friends and fellow Ebayers...I'm the mother of two wonderful daughters...

[wait, earlier she said she had 3...did one of them die?]

...both of whom are now in college. My youngest is a freshman at Virginia Tech, where she's majoring in Human Nutrition and planning to obtain her Master's degree in Public Health as well. She hopes to work with an international children's relief agency, providing nutritional information and assistance to those who need it the most. Our oldest daughter is studying to be a social worker at Temple University. One is tiny, blond and has green eyes; the other is 6' tall, with dark hair and blue eyes. They are such extraordinary children, both of whom I'm very proud....

[ok, maybe the 3rd daughter is a troll so she gets no mention]

I've found some wonderful, wonderful buys on Ebay. During a recession, there are so many opportunities to purchase truly unique, special items and give them a good new home - at great prices! I pride myself on superior customer service, with a personal touch."

did ya get that last part? nice. i still might buy the dress. it's $30 which is a fantastic deal. if it does end up looking really slutty, i'll be sure to take a photo of my ample bosom & post it here for all the creepers out there.