sometimes i think i could eat 100 nuggets. but i don't order 100 nuggets.

andy wanted me to post this a month ago, so here it is:


this was taken on may 31 at the chickfila in dalton. i'm not sure what i should say. if you're mean (like andy), you are probably assuming this lady is about to enjoy a hearty snack. and by hearty i mean ten pounds of deep-fried goodness. a kinder, gentler soul (such as myself) does not arrive at the same conclusion. maybe all the food in the bag is for her kid's baseball team. so take the above photo for whatever you will. if it doesn't say "fat," i think it definitely says "cankles."

note: getting this photo was quite a risky and complicated operation. i was totally against it, but andy convinced me it'd be good blog material if i was to get a good shot. anything for the fans, ya know? we were sitting at a table right by the door, and i was sure this lady would notice me pointing my camera at her from a short distance of, oh, say, four feet. i tried to catch her just as she was exiting the restaurant but i couldn't get a good shot since i had to keep my camera on the table and kinda behind my drink cup in order to conceal it from her and from other chickfila patrons. i still feel kinda guilty for posting this. bah.

sorry i haven't posted in two weeks

a few days ago i was stuck in some pretty gnarly traffic. right by the taco bell on howell mill. nobody was going anywhere. this guy in the car behind me starts manifesting his frustration by honking his horn. not honking at any particular driver, but honking for the hell of it. he was gesturing wildly with arms and i'm pretty sure he got even more pissed when he caught a glimpse of my camera when i held it up to the rear-view mirror. heh. but i was especially nervous because each time traffic inched forward, he would get within an inch of my bumper. please don't ever be "this guy."

*many of you may be concerned that i was filming while operating a motor vehicle - rest assured, i am an expert. i was mainly trying to capture the audio, which is why i am not paying too much attention to what is being displayed in the video.

birthday card

my grandma sent me a card for my birthday. here it is:


and the inside:



1. i don't understand what the text on the inside of the card has to do with the content on the front. it's like someone chose two cards at random and then put the front of one with the inside of another.
2. strange choice of card for a granddaughter.

weird. but i got a nice fat check inside the card so all is well.

my brain is turning to mush

now that american idol is over for a while (as well as america's next top model) you may be wondering what kinda of trash i'm watching these days. here are the shows, in no particular order:

1. so you think you can dance - like american idol, but more entertaining. i like this show a lot more than ai primarily because i can't dance, and am impressed by good dancers. not as impressed by people that can sing, because i can sing pretty well. it's the truth. you should hear my shakira impression.

2. the bachelorette - ah, deanna pappas. she's from newnan (?) and of course i saw her get rejected by stupid jerkface brad womack on the previous season of the bachelor. this girl is gorgeous. i would totally go gay for her, assuming she would have me. *omg is she kidding?*

3. legally blonde the musical: the search for the next elle woods - stupid, but when has that stopped me from watching something?

4. hell's kitchen - have been a fan of this show from the start, but this season is the worst yet. chef ramsay's trademark is that he's verbally abusive while still being somewhat humorous and light-hearted, but this season he's just plain mean. i'm still waiting for chef to call someone a donkey.

5. 30 days - apparently this is the 3rd season of this series, but i've never seen it. it's by morgan spurlock, the dude that did the supersize me documentary about mcdonalds. much different than the other shows i'm watching, as it explores real social issues - a nice contrast to the other crap i watch.

6. last comic standing - each season of this show seems to be worse than the one before, but it's still watchable.

7. farmer wants a wife - on the cw network. this show sucks, but it's better than living lohan (ugh, i'll never get that time back). the guy up for grabs is extremely unattractive. i'm actually watching it right now online - it's so bad it doesn't deserve space in the dvr.

and before you think i'm a total idiot, i should probably mention that i read enough books to counteract all the brain-mushifying. but i also read people magazine religiously, which kinda mushes it up some more. oh well. if you have any book suggestions, i wanna hear them. needs to be something substantial. like, i've never read one hundred years of solitude, but i kinda don't even wanna risk it just in case it really sucks. so let me know.